An Obama offer I can support

The inimitable Scott Ott has some inside information at Scrappleface about a White House job offer for Andy Stern.

Andy Stern, the former chief of the Service Employees International Union (SEIU), is said to be “giving serious consideration” to an offer from President Barack Obama to appoint him “special ambassador to al Qaeda” with a mission to foster establishment of collective bargaining units among decentralized clusters of contract workers.

The organization’s associates, scattered around the global, reportedly work for low pay, in a hostile environment under the constant threat of sudden termination.

One White House source said the president is “moved with compassion for the plight of front-line Qaeda staff, who labor in abysmal conditions until their often-untimely demise — typically from exposure to hazardous materials at work.”

“They’re treated like parts in a massive machine,” said the unnamed Obama adviser. “They’re disposable.”

Republicans in Congress ordinarily resist government efforts to increase unionization. However, sources close to House Minority Leader John Boehner, R-OH, indicate the GOP may actually support this presidential initiative.

“If you consider what unionization has done to American industry, and is doing to our own city, state and federal governments,” said an unnamed Boehner aide, “we can only hope that collective bargaining will have the same effect on the jihadis.”