CDC: People With Dirt On Clintons Have 843% Greater Risk Of Suicide

According to the satirical blog The Babylon Bee,

ATLANTA, GA – According to a report from the Centers for Disease Control released on Thursday, people with inside, compromising knowledge of Bill and Hillary Clinton’s financial and political dealings are 843% more likely to commit suicide.

“We’ve never seen a single risk factor cause a spike of this magnitude,” a CDC spokesperson told reporters. “Interestingly, in spite of their increased suicide risk, people with dirt on the Clintons rarely show any warning signs of suicide, and they never leave a suicide note.”

Remarking about how abnormal it is, the spokesman again stressed the significance of the data.

“Therefore, we advise any American with detrimental information about Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, or the Clinton Foundation to forget about it as quickly as possible to avoid a greatly increased probability of taking your own life,” he cautioned.

“And—I swear—that’s all we know.”

Medi-Cal to pay for assisted suicide, but not for palliative care

Stephen Frank reports for California Political Review,

In another story in the California Political News and Views we noted that the drug company that makes the lethal drug for assisted suicide is charging $3,000 for a dose—that is if you buy it privately. If you are government, the Medi-Cal system will pay $5400 for the dose to kill. That is money meant to save the lives of childs and the elderly, instead it will be used to kill people.

“California would pay an estimated $5,400 per patient just for the drugs yet Medi-Cal patients still have no access to palliative care (designed to improve the quality of life for patients and their family facing serious illnesses.) Even more incredibly, a recent study has shown that Medi-Cal recipients have only a one in three chance of even getting cancer treatments under the system and often cannot obtain second opinions.

Proponents of the assisted-suicide law insisted during last year’s debate that the lethal dose of drugs was not intended to save Medi-Cal costs yet lawmakers passed the legislation in a special session called specifically to address a Medi-Cal deficit.

So, by NOT allowing people on Medi-Cal cancer doctors, you assure their death—and by using the $5400 lethal dose, taxpayers save money. Is this unethical, immoral or just good business by government? This is the same government that spends tens of millions of dollars to keep murderers alive on death row. Confused?

Read more here.