We’ve said many times that high school isn’t just a place, but a feeling you never outgrow. That’s because you will get the same old helpless feelings into adulthood, either from being belittled by authority (then gym teacher, now boss), ditched by your best friend (then because you dated a jerk, now because she married one), or worse. That’s why, whether you’re a teen feeling lonely and isolated or a confident and in-control adult, breaking up hurts and can eat at your confidence. No matter your circumstances, however, you don’t have to let heartache undermine your belief in your ability to find lasting love and friendship. Remember, every broken relationship, like high school, has something to teach you, even if it’s just that life is hard and sometimes you’re unlucky and your gym teacher’s an asshole.
One of the most significant events in my life occurred in my first year of high school. Our basketball team, the junior varsity squad, led by the cocky little guy who writes this blog, was undefeated. At the same time, the cocky little guy who writes this blog was head over heels infatuated with a leggy female named Judy. It was serious stuff on both our parts. Judy's dad thought it was way too serious, and that he should put a stop to it.
The varsity team was coached by Judy's dad's best friend. Judy's dad was also a member of the same high school faculty. The varsity had a dismal record. Many fans wanted the dismissal of the varsity coach and his replacement by our junior varsity coach. Apparently people were writing the varsity coach threatening letters. He thought one of the letter-writers was myself. Apparently one of the letter writers had handwriting which resembled my own, particularly the way the letter "n" was written similarly to the way I write it.
By the time my father took me to a city 90 miles away to have my handwriting analyzed and exonerated by the F.B.I., the coach was fired. The junior varsity coach replaced him and we placed third in the state.
Being unjustly accused made a big impact on me. It led me to participate in the civil rights movement of the 1960s and a career in child protection. Nevertheless, Judy's dad clamped down hard, and our relationship finally ended.
