Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Important news of the day

Looking at the headlines in the National Enquirer, while waiting in line at the supermarket: good news! Oprah's mom has dislosed 57 years of Oprah secrets! I assume, therefore, that there will no longer be a need for anyone to write anything about Oprah!

At the same time, the same front cover of the magazine reveals that prison food is apparently agreeing with O.J. Simpson, whose weight has ballooned to 275 pounds. But wait, there is something about a heart attack!

I confess, though, that I did not open the tabloid to get further details on either story. You'll have to do that your own self.

2 comments:

ambisinistral said...

Hehehe... I love grocery store tabloid headlines. A couple of my favorites are:

"Scientists Find Singing Statue of Elvis on Mars"

"Scientists clone Hitlers nose -- and it grows a mustache!"

Terri Wagner said...

Well I did while waiting for a slow cashier to get to my stuff. Bottom line: not much there more lesbian claims, the young baby she "abandoned" at a young age and that's pretty much it.