Friday, August 22, 2008

"He's An Asshole in Real Life!"

I recently heard that phrase accurately applied to a man. It got me thinking about men and women for whom that designation is accurately applied. For men, it usually seems to be related either to aggressiveness or flaunting money and position. Women who fit that description are usually quieter, demanding perfection from others and themselves. For both sexes, it is about power and control. Both will eventually die earlier than they would have, if they had learned humility, kindness, and the love of God.

We all know people who fit the description. But, who among us knows how to deal with them? Must we all have to just wait for them to self-destruct, which eventually they all do? Have you recently encountered such individuals? What were they like? How did you deal with them?

5 comments:

julie said...

That's a tough one, Bob. I think you have to take it on a case-by-case basis. It's fair to say, for instance, that trolls are generally assholes. The best remedy for them is probably to just ignore them (even though we often don't). In real life, often it's impossible to ignore them. Sometimes you can disarm them, by being genuinely nice even in the face of rudeness (but by nice I don't mean wimpy and accommodating). Whatever you do, though, it's important to be firm, and as much as possible keep a cool head.

In my experience, anyway.

Terri Wagner said...

I hope a LOT of people answer this question because I have 2 employees I'm trying to work with that are ones and frankly I can't find a way to deal with them. Nice doesn't work; back at cha doesn't work; ignoring them is impossible under the circumstances; right now, I've taken to praying me or they leave the joint.

Sal said...

Detach and don't take it personally.
I've found The Work of Byron Katie
(google her) very helpful in this regard. It might not change the situation, but it will save you lots of energy otherwise lost in fuming, internal monologues and revenge schemes.

Jeffro said...

Steer clear and chalk it up to experience.

That doesn't work for terri's example, though. That is a special case.

Mrs. Who said...

Staying out of their sphere of influence as much as possible.