Many of you know that my favorite book is My Stroke of Insight by Jill Bolte Taylor. A Harvard brain scientist, Jill suffered a stroke, lost the functioning of her left hemisphere of her brain, then, after surgery, slowly regained her left hemisphere fully over a period of eight years. She learned much about her brain, but also about what a stroke survivor needs from others. She has an appendix in which she lists the forty things she needed most.
Do you have someone in your life who has suffered a stroke, is very elderly, or just otherwise needs your compassion and love? Here are some of Jill's suggestions.
I am not stupid. I am wounded. Respect me.
Be as patient with me the 20th time you teach me something, as you were the first.
Approach me with an open heart and slow your energy down. Take your time.
Make eye contact with me. I am in here - come find me. Encourage me.
Please don't raise your voice - I'm not deaf, I'm wounded.
Cheer me on. Expect me to recover completely, even if it takes twenty years!
Handle me gently, as you would handle a newborn.
Trust that my brain can always continue to learn.
Break all actions down into smaller steps of action.
Clarify for me what the next step or action is, so I can know what I am working toward.
Celebrate all my little successes. They inspire me.
Focus on what I can do, rather than bemoan what I cannot do.
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