Thursday, February 03, 2011

Polite and powerful positive confronting

I wrote recently about positively confronting people. It does not come easily to me. I did it today, after first botching it. At first I didn't say what I meant. I was off subject. I thought about it a while, and went back to the person and said exactly what I wanted to say. It felt good, and produced good results.

Then, later I was at the big box store and saw a young man I like a lot. He is smart, funny, and has a good attitude. He is a cashier there, but today, because cart-pushers were calling in sick due to the snowy weather, his supervisor asked him to push carts all day. When I saw him it was turning dark, and thus, colder. He has had a bad cold for the past five days. His voice is raspy.

I asked him if he told his supervisor that he has been battling a cold. He replied, "They know. All they have to do is listen to me talk." I told him that what they need is to hear him tell them that he has been sick, and should not be outside pushing carts. He said, "I don't want to bitch, and I feel bad for the guys who are out there. They need help."
I said, "But you are going to jeopardize your recovery from your illness."
He said, "Oh, no doubt. My mom is really mad."
So, I asked him to think about saying to his supervisor, "I have been sick, and have not fully recovered. I would really like to help the guys outside, but I think I should stay inside, so I don't relapse."
He said he would think about it. A half hour later I saw him again, and he was on his way in to tell his supervisor just that. I'll be anxious to hear how that came out.

3 comments:

Terri Wagner said...

As a manager I can tell you that door swings both ways. I'm glad the person is honest BUT it usually turns out I need them to do that and I really can't change that. I do know and sometimes it can't be helped. BUT I do tell them I know and try to make it up later but maybe letting this fellow go home early that day to rest.

Andy said...

Bob, that is one of the hardest things to "learn."

For a person (such as myself) that is non-confrontational in nature, it is almost like willing yourself to jump out of an airplane...just scared to death that the chute might not open, but you know it'll be a thrill if it does.

Okay, maybe not a good analogy, but you know what I mean.

Man, I had to get to be about 50 years old before I finally had enough inner peace with myself to be able to comfortably address issues with others on a straightforward basis.

I always skirted, and tried innuendo and charm. But, I discovered that one can be both charming and direct. Wish I'd have known that when I was young. I'd be a rich man today, I'm sure...well, maybe not rich, but I'd have sure saved myself a lot of aggravation (financially, and personally).

Bob's Blog said...

Terri,
I have no doubt you are a great manager.

Andy,
I'm glad you found out that it is never too late to learn this vital skill.