Special

At Town Hall Kurt Schlichter writes,

Just the other day – you know, late afternoon on the Friday before Labor Day – the FBI released more documents and reports related to her email shenanigans. What they revealed was, of course, that a situation that was already terrible was actually about ten times more terrible than we ever imagined. Not only did the Woman Most Qualified Ever To Be President not know how classification works, and not only did the bar-failing, chronically sick crone forget pretty much everything she ever did or said or heard, but she also managed to lose about a dozen Blackberry phones that she used to transmit classified materials.

Now, for those of you who have not worked with classified material and the equipment that transmits it, let me share with you how it might go for someone who, say, was a military guy and not a famous liberal woman:

Hi Colonel. How’s it going? By the way, I think I misplaced about 13 of those communication devices we use for classified materials. Wacky me, right? I forget where. Maybe I left them out at the range, or maybe at the base Burger King. I was getting one of those Whopperritos – yum!

Say Colonel, you don’t look so good. You’re all ashen and sweaty. Did you accidentally click on those Lena Dunham lingerie photos? Are you hungry? Do you want a bite of my Whopperito?

Cue the lockdown of the base, the 24/7 search for the missing gear, and the MPs to come and haul away Lieutenant Schmuckarelli. Oh, but don’t worry about Hillary’s lost gear. Some of those missing phones were hit with hammers, which apparently Huma and Company believes magically erases electronic data, so I guess it’s all good.

Are you freaking kidding me? If it wasn’t a famous liberal woman the elite is dying to install as president, this person would be Cool Hand Lukeing it in Leavenworth until the year 2100.

But famous liberal women don’t have to play by the rules. They can be bizarrely racist and the trained seals of the media will happily clap their fins. They can commit clear, unequivocal crimes and the FBI will eagerly do on its reputation what a bear does in the woods to excuse her. Because, after all, unlike us peasants, famous liberal women are special.

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